Greetings and welcome to my blog. I am Nicole, a genuine mess. This is my “public journal.” It’s been here for a while, but the old shit is gone and I’m starting over.
This post contains spoilers for Avengers Endgame. Continue at your own risk.
Bruce Banner, as portrayed by Mark Ruffalo has been Bae for years and I’ve kept my thirst for him mostly to myself this whole time. But in Avengers Endgame, he has managed to merge with his other — bigger, stronger, greener — half and it has shaken me to my core.
When Professor Hulk was revealed sweatered up and bespectacled, ya girl felt A Way. I can’t lie to you, I started trying to figure out the… Logistics. Cause my mind was made up. I would, in fact, let Hulk smash.
And yes, I have figured out the logistics.Continue reading »
When I watched Q watch his friends mourn him and have his life — that had now ended — validated, I felt that. Watching them let go of objects but hang on to the small, meaningful moments they represented. Him seeing himself through their eyes for the first time, understanding what he looked like to them and what he was to them. Him realizing that he had indeed affected them. It felt right.
I really don’t know what the fuck Netflix was thinking creating this show. This is a story we absolutely did not need and the timing of it’s release is questionable at best, offensive at worst.
On this, the second day of Black History Month, they release a show about a (dark-skinned) Afro-Latina witch who travels to the future from a time where she was a slave who was burned at the stake who is TRYING TO GO BACK to SAVE her SLAVE-MASTER who is also her lover. Bitch, you got me fucked up!Continue reading »
I think I love time travel so much because it allows me to ponder a way out of this world without having to kill myself.
It dawned on me a while ago that I use she/her pronouns for myself but I’ve never actually had any feelings about it one way or the other. I don’t have any emotional connection with being female. Continue reading »
I’m out of practice on doing work. I have a lot of ideas and things I want to do, but I have no discipline. I find it very difficult to focus on any task. I am incredibly quick to move on to something new without having made any significant progress in what I was already doing. I don’t know how to get things done.
I put so much energy into creating this blog only to immediately neglect it. I slip into phases of intense focus on one thing then I burn myself out and inevitably move on. In this case I think my computer crashed and I let that be my excuse to do nothing here, despite being perfectly capable of doing everything from my phone. I find it easy to derail myself with minor inconveniences.
Ain’t none of us got “free thought” by which I mean none of us are free of influence. We are not isolated. Being apart of this world means being influenced by it. But we all have the ability to think for ourselves if we choose to.